The Compassion Speak Blog by Sean Allison

I have a friend who is in chronic pain, most of the time, except when she is distracted from it. For her, the relief is in painting. She stimulates a different experience in that place of creativity.

The painting draws her into a place that is so refreshing she forgets to feel bad.

This place of Neutrality is invited. What if it were sterile, a clean sheet, an empty canvas? A place to set aside busy thoughts and ruminating emotion. A breath of fresh air, repose, rest and preparation. I invite this space of silence and stillness.

What if the silence and stillness are behind layers of my false self: behind what I have been told to believe, behind the roles I have been groomed for? What if the stillness is behind my insecurities and bad practices, or before my thought and emotion?

Let’s explore what occurs between the breaths. Imagine a place so pristine and beautiful that every part of your body relaxes. In this place, I become speechless.

When I first enter in I feel… Awkward. Like I don’t know what to do next. So I begin to describe it. Awkward, I have slowed down long enough to remember the pain I am in. The punishment of my thought as I reply. I have left the Silence by describing it. I remind myself and return my focus on breathing.

At what point do I notice my thoughtlessness? A half rest, quarter rest? What makes the music function is the space between the notes, Ah… Have you ever spaced out, Someone noticed you looked miles and miles away? In Psychology there is a term that is called dissociating. Where you are preoccupied and not fully present. There is usually a block between your emotions and thoughts and being in your body. It is a floaty ethereal numb kind of state. I find it when I am exhausted, my body checks out and rests.

Perhaps one can use this as an example and just clean up some of the practices. The first step might be in calling it something special; a place of repose or reflection, a sacred space of knowing not describing, experiencing and not feeling. One can shift from engaging thoughts to noticing them. Watching them float down a stream in a boat of your choosing.

When I seperate from my thoughts I am removing my identity from them. I notice and let go. Notice and let go. Notice and let go.

Each time that I can insert a silent space between noticing the thought I have created and myself, a neutral place appears for me to abide.

The more I practice inserting these silent moments, the more I build neural pathways that lead around my habits into a new space of creation. From within the silence, I can begin to speak into existence what I have not experienced before.

This place of neutrality can transform how I relate to my pain and punishment. More silence allows for inspiration to arrive.

I can bring in assistance and from within that reflection and experience myself from new angles. Silence between responses during a heated exchange can help me find the value in the content, rather than focus on the personality differences. Neutrality is a pivot point to new direction and a space to wait for more information to arrive.

When I encounter the pain and punishment I breathe into it. Sit with it and ebb and flow into the silence. My intention is to gather more information and notice how my pain is transformed by exploring new meaning to what happened and what is happening. The breaks of silence will transform my habits, and my experience.