What constitutes a sense of belonging? Partly it’s a place where I can BE and Long for.
When I feel safe and grounded in a group the energy that was going into protecting myself surrenders that focus into a larger picture. My thread in an infinite rug. There is a strength that emerges when our purpose is woven. Another notable observation is how that surrender of my concerns to the fabric of the whole takes me further into a sense of well being, rest and replenishment.
As a healthy personality matures one can use a variety of expressions to exchange resources. In less healthy personalities one is limited in that exchange and tends to overuse the set of behaviors that get the best results. The side effects grow as stressors build, A sense of belonging can be viewed as a way of feeling connected and cared for.
This sense of belonging incorporates environmental conditions and trust that internal needs are adequately provided for. The more starved I feel the more aggressive I may become to claim my portion of available resources.
This sense of belonging I am exploring is where my perception is focused inward in designing internal conditions that adjust with outside environments so I feel connected, and cared for.
One can virtually close their eyes and be whisked away to a relaxing place under the most extreme conditions. I see this as a vital tool.
As a teacher, I encourage students to develop questions that are rhetorical in nature or open-ended. Creating questions allows for exploration beyond one’s familiar story loops, and the places where our story gets stuck repeatedly.
Let's use another example. If I am around someone who thinks differently than myself I may dissociate, dispute or preoccupy my thoughts towards what I prefer. A focus on developing a sense of well being inwardly allows for me to shift to gathering information, increasing options. In this focus, a group of people can exchange roles within the community or family. This becomes a more stable environment for learning and development. These are essential building blocks for creating new procedures and systems.
Belonging internally builds on this feeling of security and safety. Building an internal environment of self suffices where one’s virtues become the main focus and reward. This also lends to a greater skill set in our social exchanges, decreasing triggers that erode patience and impulse control.
If I can tap into this sense of wellness my belonging can facilitate conversation and contribution. The more unsafe I feel the less I can contribute.
Belonging integrates primal urges with a flood of content that reinforces self-worth. Now foreign experiences can be mined rather than disregarded due to its risk.